here goes nothing

I haven't been doing much. I started making some videos lol. Nothing fancy, just random videos for fun. Wish I didn't just have Windows Movie Maker so I can do more stuff :P I was gonna start chem early, but so lazy lol. There's not much to do, but I know there is just don't want to do anything like always. bleh. This jasmine milk tea with custard pudding is so good T^T

Remember when I said one of my professors was a brain tumor survivor? On the last day of class, she shared a story with us. One that she shares every year. One that is heartbreaking and difficult to speak of. One that she's always gathered up the courage to share and hope to inspire.  I was far away, but I could tell she had tears in her eyes. She had a smile on her face, but I could hear the trembles in her choked up voice.  I had tears in my eyes. I felt a pain in my stomach.  I can't imagine how she must feel every time she has to bring it up. I've never experienced losing someone close to me. But I have witnessed many.  I admire her courage, her strength to move on and turn it into something inspiring.  Her daughter was so young when she passed away from cancer. I hope that she is in a better place.  You really don't know what can happen in life. Happiness can turn into despair. Vice versa.  Treasure those around you while you can. 

Everyone's studying for finals.  All the coffee, lack of sleep, & etc.  Have I started? Haha... I already took one. I didn't do so good. 71. I mean I didn't expect much anyways. I didn't really study.  Two more on Friday. Right after each other. Haven't started studying yet. Although I really should.  But it's funny. I feel like I don't even care. Like I just want to wing it.  Am I just so stressed out that it's to the point where I've given up already? Or am I just over confident about how well I'll do? Or do I just not care anymore. Because all I need is to pass the class right?  I'm too...I don't even have the word for it right now. I want to get a good grade, yet I don't want to work that hard for it. 

We were sitting on the floor against the wall in the back of the room. It was dark because the teacher was about to show us a movie he made for the class.  Jiho sat next to me and we were so close we were touching. But it's normal because we were dating.  The movie was about to start. He put his arm around my neck, pulling me close.  I wrapped my hand around his.  He pulled out his phone and showed me a post about an event his group was doing. Fans could send in messages and they would read them. "You better read mine," I said to him.  He lightly laughed and said, "Okay, of course."

Andrew Skyped me cuz he couldn't decide on the color of his shoe lol. Who knows if he's even really going to buy it. Then he showed me the women's shoes and there was this one that was so nice~~ Can't afford this either lol.  Then he was playing Pokemon lol. He can only screen share cuz he doesn't have a webcam xD  Katelyn asked who is my favorite sibling. Andrew: "It's me. You can't live without me." Me: "No comment." Lol I'm just like more like you can't live without me lol.  Anyways it was fun. Haven't talked to him in awhile. That loser. Lol. 

This is the lastest I've stayed up for awhile lol.  Jessie facetimed me today~  Haven't heard her voice for so longgg lol It was fun ^^  I didn't have much to share tho cuz nothing happens in my life lol.  The connection was not the best so it kept lagging or her voice would echo lol I wish we could all video chat more~ ^^ But I don't talk much so hope it won't be boring :p lol

The things we do to ourselves... Like not taking care of our bodies.  Are we just slowly planning for suicide?