here goes nothing

i miss being able to fall asleep a night not at 4 in the morning

everything i love makes me cry

why doesn't anything ever work out for me

it's that time again. time to enroll in new classes. i hate that i don't have enough time to take all the classes that i want to take. the disappointing thing about starting late. and having double the workload. imagine if i chose this from the beginning. classes that i would actually look forward to taking. maybe i'd be more motivated to go to class and work hard. initially i thought that i would be happier if i did this. now...i don't know anymore. it feels rushed. crammed. i'm also worried about...talent. honestly i don't think i have any. wanting to do something you have no talent in, is that really a good thing? i don't know but i guess i'll have to find out.

was it yesterday....well it's two days ago now. it may have been the worse day of my life. it kinda started a little bit before that too. -got a macbook from b*st b*y and the screen arrived cracked. nice. -woke up late and missed lecture the next day -went to the bathroom to sneeze and when i flushed the toilet the water started to flood out -doubted myself on a quiz (w/ only 1 question) and erased my correct answer then realized too late and ran out of time to finish the problem. -walking across a street with a protected signal and almost got ran over by a car -wasted 4 hrs to get an exchange at the store just to find out that they can't take it back -almost didn't have another dollar for the bus ride back -had to wait 50 mins for the bus at a bus stop with no bench -had a midterm the next day the only good thing that happened was that they gave me an exchange when i called, bless the customer service lady. the midterm...went badly... not to be evil but...

under the same circumstances not all of us would make the same choices as some of us so don't use it as an excuse to justify your mistakes

birthday, friday, the 27th 'everything is the same thing but with a different name' thank you for making me cry, but not out of sadness; then laugh, then smile, then moved, and then loved.  i may be alone at this moment, but today at least for today, i don't feel alone. thank you for all the birthday wishes, my dear friends and family  ♡ i love you all very much  ♡ to the person whom is afraid to grow up: i know you've been taking a step back to recharge. i know you feel drained everyday and don't want to do anything. i hope you don't forget everyone that loves and cares about you. i hope you don't have such a depressed view of the world. i know there's a lot of things you still want to do. don't give up! it's hard right now, but maybe soon something good will happen. if you give up before then, you might regret it. i won't lie and say that the future will be better than right now, but what i can say is that there...